1. When you hear someone say “UC,” you don’t think “University of California.”Share on Pinterest2. You know the word “Depends” has more than one important meaning.Share on Pinterest3. You never want to hear the phrase “I have to go now” again.Share on Pinterest4. A flare is not just something in a roadside emergency kit. Share on Pinterest5. You’ve seriously considered carrying a plunger in your purse. Share on Pinterest6. Your poop talk is no longer confined to discussing your child’s diapers. And your friends are used to it.Share on Pinterest7. Everyone you know will give you advice on diet, stress management, and exercise — but all of those people have colons that actually function.Share on Pinterest8. Your doctor tells you not to be stressed or embarrassed by your symptoms, which only causes you to be stressed about not being stressed about your symptoms. Share on Pinterest9. Instead of checking out where the nearest exit is in the restaurant, you always check out the quickest route to the bathroom.Share on Pinterest10. You literally LOL when someone asks if you want to go horseback riding.Share on Pinterest11. It’s totally normal to say words like “colon” and “rectum” in casual conversation, often with total strangers.Share on Pinterest12. You agree that the best thing you can do for yourself is join a gym and exercise, as long as you can get the treadmill closest to the bathroom door.Share on Pinterest13. Your friends say “Wow! You’ve lost so much weight!” and ask for your secret, like it’s a good thing.Share on Pinterest14. You’ve actually liked an official UC page on Facebook.Share on Pinterest15. You know that you’re never going to buy the green bathroom tissue that feels like tree bark, or really anything less than two-ply. Ever.Share on Pinterest16. Your fear of the line at the restroom door exceeds your fear of zombies and spiders combined.Share on Pinterest17. You really want to participate in a walk to raise money for UC research, but only if they have porta-potties strategically stationed along the route.Share on Pinterest18. You know that the hashtag #badgut has nothing to do with beer bellies.Share on Pinterest19. Your bathroom is the best decorated room in your house.Share on Pinterest20. Taco Bell is definitely not on your lists of approved foods. In fact, no Mexican food is. And neither is Indian, nor Thai, nor anything else that tastes good. Share on Pinterest21. The automatic flushing toilet doesn’t understand that you just might not be ready to leave yet.Share on Pinterest22. The phrase “trust your gut” has absolutely no meaning for you.Share on Pinterest23. You joined Costco just to buy toilet paper. Share on Pinterest24. When you got colitis, the bottom didn’t fall out from your world, the world fell out from your bottom.Share on Pinterest25. When someone shouts, “I hate your guts!” you immediately think “me, too.”Share on Pinterest26. You have your “special pants” for the day after your prednisone treatment.Share on Pinterest27. You’re on a first-name basis with the endoscopy technician.Share on Pinterest28. The list of foods you can’t eat is longer than your Christmas list.Share on Pinterest29. No one wants to go on a road trip with you, because, well, you know.Share on Pinterest
