Children can be a perpetual source of amusing thoughts that will leave you shaking your head or just plain laughing out loud.
My daughter is no exception. She is sometimes so wise beyond her years that it makes me wonder if she is 6 or 26. Over the past two years, I have collected some of the funny and weird one-liners she has blessed us with.
1. I'd rather be friends with a friendly dragon than a mean bear.
2. I love you more than all the things in my room combined.
3. I know why God invented shoes. He invented shoes so our socks don't get dirty.
4. They asked me at school today what I was good at and I told them sleeping.
5. I'm going to shut my brain off now and go to sleep. When I wake up, I'll put more sunshine in it and start the day!
6. All the boys are my friends, but not ALL are my boyfriend. Only three of them.
7. I love you, Daddy. That means I like you with all of my heart!
8. Things get really old that you love and then you get some new things!
9. I love Saturdays because you don't go to work and my heart gets broken every time you go to work.
10. I love you more than an elephant hanging from a tree.
11. You can hug and kiss me as much as you want forever.
12. I don't speak duck but I think they liked the crackers we gave them.
13. I love you so much I would bite a dragon if it tried to get you.
14. You have been working way too long. Why don't you just become the king?
15. You know why I made this fan? To dry out my tears when you make me cry.
16. If a policeman is carrying a boom box on his shoulder, he's probably not a real policeman.
17. Know what I do when I see a bug? Run away. But not into a wall.
18. I'm 4 and I know how I am...I am beautiful.
19. If you want to be like the wolf, you need to howl like the wolf and sleep on the ground.
20. Daddy, I'm going to have to go look for a new daddy because you drive a little too recklessly.
21. When the wind blows, did you know that's God hugging us?
22. The moon always stops at our house.
23. Do meatballs feel anything when we eat them? I hope not.
Where do you get all that energy?
Daughter: From God.
We are going to Amish country to see what it is like for people who live
without electricity and the Internet.
Daughter: Like when you were little?
Follow Tim on Twitter!