Rimming, also known as analingus, is the act of orally pleasuring the anus. This can involve licking, sucking, kissing, and any other pleasurable act that involves oral-to-anal contact.

Everyone!

A common misconception is that rimming is an exclusively “gay” activity because it’s focused on the anus, but your sexual identity has nothing to do with it.

If you have a butt and you want it touched, you can try this with your partner.

For the most part, yes. Like any other sex act, there is some risk involved.

Bacteria

Cleanliness is an important part of rimming, both for the ick factor and to prevent the spread of bacteria.

Digestive bacteria and parasites that pass through the anus, such as E. coli and salmonella, can make you sick if you ingest them.

Bacteria found in the anus can also cause vaginal infections.

Even in the throes of ecstasy, you’ll want to be avoid spreading bacteria to the vagina via your tongue, fingers, sex toy, or penis.

STIs

Practicing safe sex is as important when rimming as participating in any other sexual act.

Some of the STIs that can be transmitted via rimming include:

Using a dental dam can help protect you and your partner from STIs.

Nope. Rimming can be enjoyed as a standalone act or used as foreplay to any other sexual activity that you’re up for.

You don’t need to have anal if you don’t want to.

But if you do, talk to your partner before making moves in bed. It’s important to get consent every step of the way.

Let’s face it: B-town isn’t the first destination on everyone’s list of body parts to take a tongue to.

Communication and consent are key, so you’ll want to have an open and honest talk with your partner to be sure you’re both onboard.

If you’re bringing it up

First, remember that sex is a sensitive and even taboo topic for many.

Upbringing, religious beliefs, and even societal misconceptions can play a role in your partner’s attitude towards anal play.

Listen to their concerns and avoid being dismissive of them, even if you don’t agree. Be prepared to accept their response, even if it’s not the one you were hoping for.

If they’re bringing it up

If the tables are turned and you’re the one being asked to consider rimming, you’ll want to play by the same rules and hear them out.

Avoid being judgmental. You should be able to speak to each other in a way that’s rational, comfortable, and fosters trust.

The bottom line

Consent is a must. No one should ever be pressured into doing anything they don’t want to do. If either of you isn’t fully onboard, then agree to table the discussion for another time. If the answer is a firm “no,” then that needs to be respected.

As enjoyable as rimming can be, there are times when skipping the B-side is probably best.

You’ll want to shelf the act if you or your partner is dealing with any of the following:

  • gas
  • diarrhea
  • constipation
  • bleeding
  • open sores, including hemorrhoids
  • digestive infections
  • cold sores

Try not to let embarrassment keep you from being honest and open with your partner about why you might need to pass on some bum fun.

No one wants a face full of gas, so they’ll appreciate the honesty.

It’s totally up to you.

Having hair between your cheeks is perfectly normal, but if you find it unsightly or in any way uncomfortable, then by all means book a wax or get out the clippers.

There are pros and cons to going bare back there that are worth considering.

Pros to consider

  • All the feels. Clearing the area opens the way for all the sensation. The less there is between the rimmie’s butt and the rimmer’s tongue, the more intense the stimulation.
  • Cleanliness. It’s not that you can’t get a good clean if there’s hair around your anus, but not having any certainly makes it easier. Bits of toilet paper, towel fluff, and even poo can stick to hairs.
  • One less hang-up. Worrying about how your anus looks or whether or not it’s going to be a turnoff for your partner can hinder your enjoyment. If it’s one of your hang-ups, getting rid of it can help you relax and enjoy the experience.

Cons to consider

  • Skin irritation. There’s a risk of skin irritation with any hair removal method, especially in such a delicate area that may not have had any contact with a razor or wax before. If you’re going to remove the hair, give your skin time to heal before you get rimmed.
  • Ingrown hairs. Regrowth can be a literal pain in the butt. As the hair grows back, you may have to contend with some itching and prickling, and maybe even painful ingrown hairs. It’s only temporary, but still worth considering.
  • Risk of infection. This goes hand-in-hand with the two points above. Anytime you expose your skin to irritation or injury, there’s a risk of infection. If you decide to go ahead with hair removal, do it carefully and keep the area clean.

You don’t have to if you don’t want to.

A mild enema flushes and releases water to initiate a bowel movement.

On the plus side, an enema:

  • can clear your anal cavity of feces and bacteria
  • may help you feel more confident in your bum situation, improving your enjoyment
  • is a source of erotic pleasure for some people

But on the downside:

  • not everyone enjoys them and some find them uncomfortable
  • there’s a risk of tears and infection
  • frequent enemas can disrupt the rectum, bowels, and digestive tract and interfere with your elimination rhythm

Using protection is the best way to minimize your risk for STIs.

If you’re worried that protection will take away from the pleasure, don’t be — the giver will still be able to control their moves and the receiver will be able to feel them.

Condoms are also a bonus for anyone who’s a little uneasy about direct tongue-to-anus contact.

You can use dental dams, which are sheets of latex that can be placed over the anus to create a barrier. There are also tongue condoms, which are sleeves worn over the tongue during oral sex.

Regular “male” condoms can also be modified to use as a dam and provide protection on the fly.

Here’s how:

  1. Use sharp scissors to carefully cut the tip off the condom.
  2. Cut across the bottom of the condom just above the rim.
  3. Cut down one side of the condom.
  4. Lay flat over the anus.

Lube can enhance the experience and is an absolute must if anal sex is also on the agenda.

Lube lets the tongue and fingers slide with the greatest of ease, which you’ll both enjoy.

There are also flavored lubes and lubes specifically for rim jobs that can make things more palatable.

Though you can definitely experiment to find positions that work for you, a modified version of doggie style — or “four on the floor” — is the most obvious choice.

To do this, have the person receiving the rimming get down on the floor or bed on all fours.

If you’re performing the rimming, you should:

  1. Kneel behind your partner.
  2. Use your hands to guide your partner’s butt to the height that provides the best angle.
  3. Use your hands to spread your partner’s cheeks.

You could also try having the recipient:

  • Stand in front of a table, chair, or bed and bend over it while you kneel behind.
  • Stand and bend at the waist, and hold their ankles while you kneel or crouch behind.
  • Lie on their back with two pillows under their hips and their knees pulled toward their chest, while you kneel between their thighs.

Start off slow and work your way to the money spot instead of going in for the kill right away.

Soft, light licks and kisses of the inner thighs and perineum are a great start and sure to get them primed for action.

When you’re ready to move to the anus, you can’t go wrong by using your tongue much in the same manner you would to lick an ice cream cone.

Here are some tips:

  • Use long, slow licks with your tongue flat against your partner’s anus.
  • Experiment with your tongue, alternating between stiffening and relaxing it.
  • Try different directions, such as up and down and side to side.
  • Point your tongue and push it against their anus, using enough pressure to gently penetrate.

Aside from some tiny nibbles on the cheek, most people would prefer you refrain from having your teeth come into direct contact with their butt.

Here’s what to do:

  • Make sure they’re open to a little toothy action — communication and consent are a must!
  • Run your front teeth lightly along the backs of their thighs and cheeks, barely grazing the skin.
  • Try light, gentle nibbles, sticking to the butt cheeks where there’s enough flesh to take it.

Hot breath against the skin can be a real turn-on and is especially stimulating against the inner thighs and bottom.

Tease your partner by getting your lips just close enough to their skin that they can feel your breath.

Try alternating with some light kissing and licking, too.

Your hands can work some real magic when it comes to pleasuring your partner, so be sure to use them.

Use your hands to:

  • Play with your partner’s nipples, gently squeezing or pulling on them.
  • Rub your partner’s clitoris.
  • Penetrate their vagina with your fingers.
  • Stroke their penis.
  • Gently squeeze and caress your partner’s scrotum.
  • Caress their neck, back, or inner thighs.
  • Squeeze or lightly spank their cheeks.

As long as it’s enjoyed between consenting adults, rimming is a highly sensational act worth adding to your repertoire. Just remember to practice safe sex and clean up before you get down and dirty.