19 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Someone with the Stomach Flu

Written by Adam Wenger on February 4, 2015
man with stomach flu

1. You look so skinny! Which juice cleanse are you on?

2. All-you-can-eat oysters was probably a bad idea.

3. How are you going to keep all this weight off when you get better?

4. Isn’t that what Pepto-Bismol is for?

5. You know that one scene in "Bridesmaids"? I laughed so hard I almost puked.

bridesmaids stomach flu

6. Should I order the lasagna or the nachos? Maybe I'll get both.

7. You know what I never get sick of? Rice and water.

8. Did someone order egg salad? It smells like a sulfur mine in here!

9. I'm going on a coffee run, who's in?

10. Do you want the rest of my carnitas burrito? It’s got extra sour cream.

11. I can't remember the last time I threw up.

12. What'd you eat? Was it raw?

13. I had the driest tuna salad earlier. It really needed another big glob of mayonnaise in it.

14. I know the stomach flu sucks, but you're going to lose so much weight. Really you're lucky!

15. I never tell anyone I have the stomach flu because, really, who wants to say they have diarrhea?

16. Three words: Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

17. You know what would make you feel better? A rollercoaster ride!

18. Where did you eat last? Oh yeah, everyone gets sick there.

19. Is it hot in here? You look super sweaty.

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