Biromantic people can be romantically attracted to people of two or more genders — in other words, multiple genders.
It differs from bisexuality in that being biromantic is about romantic attraction, not sexual attraction.
The prefix “bi-” means “two,” but bisexuality and biromanticism aren’t about just two genders.
Gender isn’t a binary — in other words, “men” and “women” aren’t the only genders you can identify with.
Someone who is nonbinary doesn’t identify exclusively as a man or woman.
Nonbinary is an umbrella term encompassing many individual gender identities, such as bigender, pangender, genderfluid, and agender, to name just a few.
The meaning of “bisexual” and “biromantic” can include nonbinary people, which is why bisexuality and biromanticism are about experiencing attraction to two or more genders.
Being biromantic looks different to different people. It could look like:
- romantic attraction to men and women, but not nonbinary people
- romantic attraction to men and nonbinary people, but not women
- romantic attraction to women and nonbinary people, but not men
- romantic attraction to men, women, and people with certain nonbinary identities
- romantic attraction to people of all gender identities
- romantic attraction to nonbinary people of various gender identities, but not binary people (that is, people who identify exclusively as men or women)
If you’re biromantic, you might find yourself relating to one or more of the following statements:
- You find that gender isn’t an important factor for you when it comes to deciding who you want to date and commit to.
- You’ve desired romantic relationships with people who fit into one gender group and people who fit into another gender group.
- When you imagine a future romantic partner, you’re not always picturing someone of the same gender.
Remember, there’s no one way to be biromantic — all biromantic people are unique. So, you might be biromantic without relating to the above.
Panromantic means having the capacity to be romantically attracted to people of all genders.
Biromantic means having the capacity to be romantically attracted to people of multiple genders.
Biromantic is a little open-ended as it could mean you’re romantically attracted to two, three, four, five, or all gender groups.
Panromantic, on the other hand, is about all gender groups. In other words, there’s a bit of an overlap.
Some people identify as both biromantic and panromantic. Sometimes, people use the term biromantic instead of panromantic to specify that they’re not romantically attracted to all gender groups.
For example, someone might only find themselves attracted to women and nonbinary people, but not men. In this case, biromantic describes them well, but panromantic doesn’t.
It’s ultimately up to you as an individual to choose which label or labels suit you best.
It’s possible to be both biromantic and bisexual. This means you are both romantically and sexually attracted to people of multiple genders.
However, some biromantic people have sexual orientations that differ from their romantic orientation.
This is called “mixed orientation” or “cross-orientation” — when you’re romantically attracted to one group of people and sexually attracted to another group of people.
Here are a few examples of biromantic people with mixed orientation:
- A biromantic, asexual person is romantically attracted to people of multiple genders, but experiences little to no sexual attraction.
- A biromantic, homosexual woman is romantically attracted to people of multiple genders, but is only sexually attracted to women.
- A biromantic, homosexual man is romantically attracted to people of multiple genders, but is only sexually attracted to men.
- A biromantic, heterosexual woman is romantically attracted to people of multiple genders, but is only sexually attracted to men.
- A biromantic, pansexual person is romantically attracted to people of multiple genders, but is sexually attracted to all genders. Perhaps they find themselves romantically attracted to men and nonbinary people, but not women.
These are only a few examples of what mixed orientation can look like. These are not the only ways to describe yourself.
Yes. Often, “bisexual” is used to describe both romantic and sexual orientation.
However, as mentioned earlier, mixed orientation is a thing and you can be bisexual without being biromantic — and vice versa.
Many people feel that sexual and romantic attraction are one and the same.
Some say that the word bisexual implies that you’re romantically attracted to two or more genders, as well as sexually attracted to two or more genders.
In recent years, we have learned that mixed orientation is a real thing, and that there are multiple ways to experience attraction.
So, you’ve figured out that you’re biromantic. Awesome! At this point, you may want to tell the people in your life.
For some people, coming out can feel ceremonious. For others, it’s more casual. Coming out could look like:
- gathering your friends and family in person and telling them you’re biromantic
- talking one-on-one with your loved ones and telling them you’re biromantic
- making a social media post where you explain your romantic orientation
- watching Netflix with your friend and casually saying, “By the way, I’m biromantic!”
The point is that there’s no “right” way to come out as biromantic — it’s all up to you to decide what feels comfortable.
When coming out as biromantic, you might want to use the following talking points:
- Start off by saying that there’s something you’d like to share with them. Tell them you’re biromantic.
- Explain what it means. You might say, “This means I’m capable of being romantically attracted to people of multiple genders.” Perhaps explain which genders you’re attracted to.
- If you’d like, explain your sexual orientation, too, and the difference between romantic and sexual attraction.
- Tell them what kind of support you need. For example, you can say, “I’d like to talk about the feelings I have. Can I vent to you?” or “Could you help me tell my parents?” or “I just wanted to let you know because it’s important to me.”
If you’re coming out to someone in person and you’re nervous about their reaction, it might be wise to bring a supportive friend along.
Not a fan of in-person conversations? Consider coming out over text or phone call. Many people come out via social media, which helps them tell multiple people at once and garner love and support from those around them.
To learn more about biromanticism, check out the following online resources:
- Asexual Visibility and Education Network, where you can search the definitions of different words relating to sexuality and orientation
- Bisexual Resource Center and BiNet USA, which are both excellent sources of information and support for biromantic and bisexual people
- GLAAD, which has a number of resources and articles on their site
You might also want to join local LGBTIQA+ groups, if you’d like to have face-to-face support. Facebook groups and Reddit forums can also be a helpful source of information and support.
Remember that the label(s) you choose to describe your experiences — if any — are up to you. No one else can dictate how you identify or express your orientation.
Sian Ferguson is a freelance writer and editor based in Cape Town, South Africa. Her writing covers issues relating to social justice, cannabis, and health. You can reach out to her on Twitter.