Whitney Casey stops by the Better studio to share a way to keep your love in mind while the holidays take our focus.
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Audra Lowe: In a holidays, parties, parents and presence all peace. They are all vying for your time, so how do you wrap up all the holiday hoopla without completely unraveling your relationships and also keeping your sanity? Joining us today with some great tips is Better’s relationship expert and author of “The Man Plan”, Whitney Casey. Just within our parents, everything with the presents, too much going on, right? Whitney Casey: Yeah, and the holidays are always loaded with things and not loaded with time for each other and you’ve got parents around and you’ve got kids saying, “I want this and this” and in the first thing I say that you need to do is rather than a to do list. Audra Lowe: Okay. Whitney Casey: Or to dear list. Audra Lowe: Okay, let me interrupt you. This one I call Whitney’s freaky segment. Whitney Casey: Yeah. Audra Lowe: That’s what we’re going to call this one here because— Whitney Casey: Hooky. Audra Lowe: Yeah, the to-do list you’re talking about, list of all the things that you plan on doing to love him better. Is it also a list of things you want him to do? Whitney Casey: Yes. Audra Lowe: Okay. Whitney Casey: Well, but you incorporate those in it. Audra Lowe: Okay, I’ve got it. Whitney Casey: So, it’s your to dear list like to dear would be like one, “Dude, I need you to go pick up the Christmas tree” or “You know, I need you to take out the Christmas tree” Two, “I want you to know I love you so much” You know, so you mix in to-dears with to-dos. Audra Lowe: I see. Whitney Casey: And men are actually read with to do list because and especially we give to him in morning their hormones are their highest in the morning and their testosterone is high that means they are ready to be active and get things done. Audra Lowe: I never know that. Whitney Casey: Give it to him in the morning. Audra Lowe: That’s good. Okay, now the next one you say is be present, share the load and that’s all that wrap in yourself up in a bow. Whitney Casey: Yeah, you know what I notice it sounds so cheesy but I’m saying, “Okay, yeah” You should what you want to do for your spouse let’s say, “Okay, I’m going to give you today five hours to be there for you, to be your sure bowl, to do favors for you that you need to get done during then holidays.” Audra Lowe: Right. Whitney Casey: So, it’s kind of like, you guys, it’s not like been he’s just like you know your love slave. You then just say, “I need five hours of your time to help with the load.” Audra Lowe: Right. Whitney Casey: So, you actually give them five hours like you make a little certificate and say. “Here’s five hours. We’re going to share load. You’ll be the present.” Audra Lowe: Uninterrupted time for us. Whitney Casey: Yes. Audra Lowe: Okay, and also don’t just give presents but actually be present. I really like this a lot. You forget during the holidays with so much stuff going on. You run in here you run in there but actually be in a moment, right? Whitney Casey: Just take your time like if you can really find 30 minutes in a day or 20 even just to be with your spouse. You’re not talking about plans. You’re not talking about who’s coming over, talking about to dear or to do list. You’re just being like even if he’s putting your foot on his lap while you are just relaxing. You really need to take 20 minutes to come back together. Audra Lowe: Have that quiet time. Whitney Casey: It’s super important. Audra Lowe: This is not that bad. It’s actually really good when you do it. Alright, next one here this is naughty or nice, find the sweet Santa outfit to make for a little pre-Christmas delivery. Are you allowed to say what this is all about on TV here? Whitney Casey: I mean I’m saying that. Just saying but I’m saying that you know what if you do it’s a really great little treat here. They have them in all those little credit to Hollywood. Audra Lowe: Right. Whitney Casey: You know maybe little Santa cap and some lingerie just try it I mean, and that not only pres