Parent Coach Lorraine Thomas discusses how to deal with problem toddlers.
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Eils Hewitt: The Parent Coaching Academy provides help and support to new parents. It's developed a unique seven day model that motivates parents to tackle family problems with a practical action plan. Lorraine Thomas is the Academy's Chief Executive. Thanks very much for coming to chat to us today. So you have written this book, the 7 Day Parent Coach. What is the essence of the book? Lorraine Thomas: The 7 Day Parent Coach, people say to me can you really make a big difference in the stress and strains the parents feel in seven days. And I thought of the 7 Day Parent Coach because actually parents are fantastic problem solvers. So actually, once they sort of focus on a particular area of their life, a particular problem, they want to make some changes in, really set their mind on doing it, they can make a huge difference in seven days. And I think the essence of parent coaching is really closing the gap between where parents are now and where they want to be and how they can get from where they are today to where they want to be. So I work with them. I think as a mom or a dad, it's the most rewarding job, isn't it? But it's also the most challenging, isn't it? I think nobody can ever explain it to you what a difference being a mom will make in your life, can you? Because it's like a complete roller-coaster, isn't it? You have the high, the emotional highs and lows in the space of five minutes. So I think with parent coaching, I am just taking on board that moms and dads are doing most challenging job they can ever do and to try make it as enjoyable as possible by helping them identify some of the areas, some of the problems that are causing them stress and draining their energy and helping them to focus on particular areas and come out with a practical action plan. So we don't just sit around and talk about the problems and think about them. We actually say, okay so what are we going to do about it? And it's very focused on the solution. So we look at the problems that parents face and -- Eils Hewitt: What would be the most kind of common problem? Lorraine Thomas: Well, I work with parents of all ages. Actually but parents with new babies are a key area for me because it's such a shock, isn't it? And so there are lots of areas to stress. I think, being a parent is the most important job you will ever do in your life, isn't it? And I think it's a huge responsibility, it's a fantastic responsibility, but there is so much to take on board. And I think one of the key areas of stress that moms I work with particularly is they have the new baby and they are coming to terms with broken nights and they are passionate about being the best mom they can possibly be but they want to be the perfect mom. They try to do everything for everybody and I think moms are particularly good at shuffling themselves down the pack. They put their baby first and their partner if they go on their friends, the family next door neighbor, the strangers, down the road. Eils Hewitt: And still try to get meal on a table at 6 o'clock. Lorraine Thomas: Absolutely. And they put themselves right to the bottom and that's what moms are fantastic at doing. They are carers and they look after everybody else. And actually as a parent coach, I say to moms, it's really important that you look after yourself, because you are the engine actually, and if you are feeling tired and stressed and you can't cope and your life is spinning a little bit out of control, then that's going to impact on your baby and all of your relationships. If you are feeling in control, motivated, you are feeling really positive, then that will have a great effect. So I work with moms to be fun not frantic moms. And I think as a new mom, there kind of seems so much to do and you want to do it all so well. And I think if you try to be the perfect mom, you are setting yourself up to fail, because there is no such thing. The perfect mom doesn't exit, the perfect child -- Eils Hewitt: So we have