I lost my virginity over a year ago, but every time we have sex it feels like losing my virginity all over again. Should it still be hurting? Is this normal?
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Jennifer: Dear Dan and Jennifer. I lost my virginity almost a year ago. Dan: What's with that girl? Jennifer: But ever since— Dan: Sorry. Jennifer: Every time me and my boyfriend have sex, it’s like loosing my virginity all over again. The first time bled but none of the others have, it just hurts really bad. Is this normal and have you ever heard of it? Should it still be hurting? No. Dan: No. Most thing, shouldn’t still be hurting. Under normal operating conditions, that shouldn’t be hurting unless you have an ongoing issue that needs to be resolved as a role of your body doesn’t tend to hurt. Jennifer: Yeah, the first thing we like to say is go see your doctor. If you ever have a question about some physical thing like that, go see your doctor. Dan: And a lot of people are weird about— “Oh, but its my privates.” Who the hell cares? I mean, you know, if your car is making a squeaking noise, you take it to your mechanic. Dude, its making a squeaking noise. You know, if you have a problem you take it to the people mechanic, you know, and you tell them, “Dude, my thing is making a squeaking noise.” It’s okay to go to your doctor and if you don’t—if you're uncomfortable, besides some people are uncomfortable talking to their doctor about a sexual thing or whatever, it means, you're maybe going to the wrong doctor. Jennifer: Well, and trust me, your doctor has seen it all and then some, okay. If you think your problem is unique, forget it. Okay, your doctor has seen it all. Dan: You're not the only one that have a question about his PP or something, you know. Jennifer: Yeah, and I agree with Dan. If you're uncomfortable talking to your doctor, find a different doctor that you are comfortable talking to. Dan: Absolutely. But not talking to your doctor because you're uncomfortable, not a good thing. Jennifer: Okay, so lets assume for a just a second, its not some illness or bacteria effect. Dan: Not a mechanical issue. Jennifer: Something—nothing that a doctor needs to fix. We kind of did a little brainstorming on this and here’s kind of some ideas that we came up with. One, if he’s really large and you're really small, that could be the problem, okay. Dan: There is the consent of matching hardware, you know. Jennifer: Matching hardware. And you know, it can be worked around, I mean, if he’d—you'd need a lot of warm up time in that situation because your muscles were relax and you know, kind of— Dan: Oh, guys are so focused that, “Oh! My God, am I big enough?” If you see these guys, yeah, I’ve got a two footer, you know. And you know, they think that there's like a landing strip inside the girl, you know. And its really not like that, you know, it’s a limited space and sometimes the guy—many times, the guy maybe too big to fit comfortably and to not hurt her, sometimes smaller, whatever, but it is important to match. Jennifer: And believe it or not, sometimes too small is easier to work with than too big. Dan: Yeah! I might say size doesn’t matter but that’s such a pitiful cliché. It’s not even funny. Jennifer: And along those same lines, you may not be producing quite enough lubrication, so make sure you're using a good water-based lube, okay, always, because if you don’t, what can happen if it gets dry in there or if its not moist enough to start with, then it cause tearing. And I was telling Dan earlier, it’s like an Indian burn, right. I mean, you got skin on skin, dry skin on skin. Dan: Worse than a paper cut. Jennifer: Yeah, it’s “aw.” Okay, use lube. Dan: “Aw,” indeed. Jennifer: Also, the big one that a lot of people don’t think about could be some kind of an allergic reaction. You could be allergic if you're using condoms. You could be allergic to latex or that particular brand of condom. Or the spermicide that’s on the condom or lube or even getting a little more bizarre, you could be allergic to something in his body chemistry, some cologne he’s using. Something he ate. Dan: Yeah! Allergic to him, that’s not cool. Jennif