In this relationship video Matt Titus and Tamsen Fadal tell you how to explain to your partner that they are not living up to your standards in bed.
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Tamsen: Hey, everybody, it’s Matt and Tamsen here. Okay, this topic came from actually a real life question. Matt: Was it my question? Tamsen: Who would have made it up? Somebody wrote in to ask if they should—I can’t even say it. Matt: If they should tell their partner that the sex that they’ve had is bad. Tamsen: How do you do that? Matt: You, well, you should and you should do it in a very subtle way. You have to—you know, if you plan on sticking around with this person, why do you wanna stick around for bad sex? Because guys they’re not going to stick around for bad sex. Tamsen: Okay. Just don’t say anything. I can’t get out of the relationship. What are you gonna say? That wasn’t so good? Matt: I’m gonna say, you know what? I appreciate everything that we’ve done but you know what— Tamsen: And appreciate your attempt? Matt: Yes. But I think I like it better this way. Let’s try this. Let—you know, I think you have to work with each other to have great sex. It takes a while to have great sex. So, you have to work together and you have to let that person know that—yeah, they’re just not doing it for you. Tamsen: Okay. But you don’t come out and say like, wow, that was a waste of time. Matt: Why, I never heard that in my life from anybody. But I ca imagine that that would be very hard to hear. You know honestly, you need to tell them to tell them in a very, you now… Tamsen: Subtle. Matt: Subtle and informative way. I mean, what do you guys’ thing? Would you tell somebody that you really are into that the sex sucked? Would you tell them that? Let us know. This has been Matt and Tamsen signing off.
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