If you have depression, it can be difficult to explain exactly what you’re going through. You may feel like people won’t understand. In an effort to break down this barrier, these 10 men and women share the details of their depression and show that you’re not alone.
It feels like constant noise in my head, like you want to be happy and get up and do things, but physically you’re too exhausted to do anything. I have constant chronic pain all over my body to the point [where] I find walking difficult. Getting out of bed is very difficult, both mentally and physically. I hate my depression. I’m a well person stuck inside this awful depressed body.
I wish my loved ones would just embrace me and tell me that although they cannot feel my feelings, they understand and wish they could whisk it away — that they love me no matter what — but since they can’t, that they will be there until I am over the ‘flair up.’
Wearing ‘my mask’ is sometimes more exhausting than the depression itself. I wish I could just let my feelings show.
I get completely exhausted from trying to maintain ‘normal,’ then I sleep for days.
I just have this overwhelming sense of sadness that never goes away. I don’t have a purpose in life. I feel I am not worthy to feel any better. My self esteem is nonexistent, and I work against myself when it comes to taking steps to get better. I have been depressed for so long, I don’t know life without depression. I’m on meds and go to therapy, but I sabotage my wellness because I don’t feel I deserve any better. It’s just so sad [that] I feel this way about myself and my recovery.
Putting up a front so people won’t pity me basically is exhausting. When you’re down in your mental health, your physical strength just isn’t there either. I sleep a lot anyway, but when I’m having a depressive episode I sleep so much more. People notice I’m tired while I’m going through an episode, but I don’t have the energy to even begin to explain that I’m not just ‘sleepy tired.’ I’m tired of pretending to be fine and happy and trying to keep my energy high enough to function through work, and then weekend comes and I neglect house chores because I’m so damn tired and it’s just a whirlwind of exhaustion.
It feels like the worst sickness, every minute of every day, with no end in sight.
It drains me. [I] just want to stay in bed, [with the] lights off and talk to no one. It can be very hard to mask at work, especially when you are in the customer service arena.
I feel tired all the time, [and I] have hyperacidity, anemia, and eczema.
I have forgotten the days without it. It’s almost a sick friend to me [because] it’s always there. I have slash marks all over my arms [and] wrists. When I try to get help, they just add a disorder on my record and say ‘move along.’ Now I carry the stigma of all this, but [I’m] not able to get professional help. Waiting lists are backed up for years.
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