Aggressive Behavior Health Article

Factors that increase risk of violent behavior

Parents and teachers should be careful not to play down aggressive behaviors in children. In fact, certain factors put some children at risk for developing violent behaviors as adults. These factors include the following:

• being the victim of physical and sexual abuse
• exposure to violence in the home and community
• exposure to violence in media (TV, movies)
• use of drugs and alcohol
• presence of firearms in home
• combination of stressful family socioeconomic factors (poverty, severe deprivation, marital breakup, single parenting, unemployment, loss of support from extended family)
• brain injury

Parents can teach children nonviolence by controlling their own tempers. If parents express anger in quiet, assertive ways, children may follow their parent's example. Children need to understand when they have done something wrong so they can learn to take responsibility for their actions and learn ways to make amends. Responsible parenting does not to tolerate violence or use it in any way.

Violence prevention strategies

Efforts should be directed at dramatically decreasing the exposure of children and adolescents to violence in the home, community, and through the media. Clearly, violence leads to violence. Parents can use the following strategies to reduce or prevent violent behavior:

• prevent child abuse in the home
• provide sex education and parenting programs for adolescents
• provide early intervention programs for violent youngsters
• monitor children's TV programs, videos, and movies

The most important step that parents can take with aggressive children is to set firm, consistent limits and be sure that everyone caring for the children acts in accord with the parents' rules and expectations.

Parents should know the importance of helping children find ways to deal with anger without resorting to violence. Children can learn to say no to their peers, and they can learn how to settle differences with words instead of physical aggression. When children control their violent impulses, they should be praised.

Parental concerns

All children have feelings of anger and aggression. Children need to learn positive ways to express these feelings and to negotiate for what they want while maintaining respect for others. Parents can help their children develop judgment, self discipline, and the other tools children need to express feelings in more acceptable ways and to live with others in a safe way.

Understanding the aggressive child

When children lose their sense of connection to others, they may feel tense, frightened, or isolated. These are the times when they may unintentionally lash out at other children, even children to whom they are close. Parents should be careful not to let children think aggression is acceptable.

When children are overcome with feelings of isolation or despair, they may run for the nearest safe person and begin to cry. They immediately release the terrible feelings, trusting that they are safe from danger and criticism. Effective parents listen and allow the child to vent without becoming alarmed.

Disciplining aggressive behavior

Parents can control the aggressive child in various ways. They should intervene quickly but calmly to interrupt the aggression and prevent the their child from hurting another child. Younger children may need a time-out to calm down and before rejoining a group. Simple rules about appropriate behavior are easier for a child to understand than lengthy explanations. Parents can affirm feelings while stressing that all feelings cannot be acted upon.

Parents can reach older children with eye contact, a stern voice, and physical contact. Older children can be told that they need to learn a better way to handle conflicts. Parents can suggest that, for instance, the child ask an adult to intervene before lashing out at a classmate. Any disciplinary measures should be explained as a simple consequence to the child's aggression.

When parents arrive after conflict occurs, it may be useful to listen to the child's explanation. Having a parent listen can encourage the child to develop trust in the parent.

Parents should not expect the aggressive child to be reasonable when he or she is upset. The child may need time to calm down. Sometimes the child may feel trapped and may need adult support. Parents should encourage the aggressive child to come to them when they are upset, hopefully before violence occurs.