Schools and Parents Taking Action to Stop Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is online harassment via electronic devices, including email, text messaging, and online teen forums. The nature of this assault can be even worse than the old-fashioned kind of physical and verbal bullying - because of the anonymity and the sheer number of people it can reach. A recent article in the Wall Street Journal by Anne Marie Chaker suggests that schools are getting more and more calls to intervene from parents, but are stuck because much of the nastiness is taking place on home computers, where they have no authority.

The National Schools Boards Association and schools in many states are creating new policies that deal with cyberbullying and many are prohibiting any form of bullying (and spelling out what constitutes bullying) in honor codes. MySpace.com is doing its part by providing a link for students to report abuse and asking schools to report any offensive or threatening behavior via a hotline and email address for school officials to use for that reporting. One complication seems to be First Amendment rights, however, most people seem to believe that any cyberbullying that threatens violence or disrupts the learning environment, can and should be addressed by the school.

Parents, remember the basics of online security - know what your kids are up to on the computer, keep computers out of bedrooms and in public areas, check the history logs to see where your kids are spending their time online, talk about appropriate use of online forums, and make clear what your values are about bullying. It is also not a bad idea to spend some time on MySpace - it will give you plenty of ideas about what to talk to your teens about!

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Labels: Bullying

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HIV and African American Teens

It is not often you hear adults saying that teen girls need to talk more, but in fact, they need to talk more about HIV/AIDS, and adults need to talk with them! A recent op-ed by Janice Armstrong encouraged young black girls to stop having unprotected sex in the name of love - it is killing them!

AIDS is a preventable disease and the leading cause of death for African American females between the ages of 25 and 34. Nearly 70% of all new HIV infections in the United States between 2001 and 2004 were in black females, most of whom got it from their male partners. Black women are 19 times more likely to be infected with HIV than white women and 13 times more likely to die from the disease.

When we are talking to our friends and our daughters, it is important to remember that the things we are not saying, can kill us! Talk about condoms, HIV, and protection during sex - all types of sex - oral, anal, and vaginal. When talking about love, talk about protection!

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Labels: HIV

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Good Sex = Good Communication

Ask any adult woman if communication matters to sex and you will get a clear answer - YES! Ask a teenager, and you are likely to get many different answers.

A recent research study by Widman, Welsh, McNulty & Little published in the Journal of Adolescent Health explored communication and contraceptive use in adolescent couples. Their results suggested that open sexual communication is important to contraception, and specifically:

• 30% of the couples did not use contraception during first intercourse;
• Almost 50% of couples did not use contraception every time they had sex;
• Open sexual communication meant more contraceptive use; and
• Teens who reported being more satisfied with their relationship reported more open sexual communication.

So, the take home message is - teens who talk about sex are happier in their relationships and more likely to use contraception - translating to parents as follows:

• Talk to your teens about sex and protection;
• Clearly state your expectation that before they have sex they need to be able to talk about sex with their partner - about protecting themselves from HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases and deciding on a reliable method of birth control to protect themselves against unwanted pregnancy; and
• make sure they know where to obtain condoms and birth control.

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Labels: Sexuality

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Turn the TV Off!

Did you know that watching 10 hours of TV a week (or more) is shown to negatively affect academic achievement? It is true, along with other things, like kids who watch TV are more likely to be obese and are exposed to more violence, and kids with TVs in their rooms get lower grades. But wait, it is not the end of the world - there is something you can do about it!

Start talking now with your family about participating in TV-Turnoff Week, April 23-29, 2007! Start by documenting how much TV you actually watch each week, then visit ScreenTime.org and get the facts about the consequences of watching that much TV. Then, when you are completely aware and mortified, make a list of alternative things you can do during TV-Turnoff Week. Keep talking about it and put it on the calendar!

To make it easier, involve your schools and friends - it is easier if no one is watching TV that week. I guarantee that you will spend more time together as a family and have more fun because of it.

Resources
Common Sense Media
ScreenTime.org

Quotes
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. -Groucho Marx

In many families the television seems to substitute, rather than facilitate dialogue among people. A type of 'fast' in this area could also be healthy. -Pope John Paul II during a speech calling for a 40-day TV-Turnoff

Television is a chewing gum for the eyes. -Frank Lloyd Wright

Given our national television habit, it is no surprise that we are raising the most sedentary and most overweight generation of youngsters in American history. As they grow, these children will run increased risks of heart disease, diabetes, and other health problems -- unless they turn off the tube and become physically active. -US Surgeon General David Satcher, M.D., Ph.D.

The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same joke and still feel lonely. -T.S. Eliot

Television is no substitute for a parent. It doesn’t help develop language skills; it’s simply background noise. -First Lady Laura Bush

Photo credit: Eric in SF

Labels: Media

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What Are Your Priorities?

I was really struck last month on vacation by how much I loved having unstructured time with my daughters and in comparison how much of our time together during the school year happens while on the way to medical or dental appointments, school activities, and other structured activities like music and gymnastics lessons.

I am also feeling a little guilty about all of the things I encourage parents to do with their teens. Not only are parents responsible for the day-to-day stuff, the working, cooking, cleaning, driving, and homework supervision, but then comes the responsibility for teaching values, community service and media literacy. How on earth are we expected to "do it all" and where do we place our priorities?

Here is an interesting activity to do yourself, and then with your teens. It is an activity to help you identify if your stated priorities match how you spend your time, and it will start plenty of conversations around the dinner table. You could do this activity after watching the movie "Click" about a guy whose choices do not match his priorities!

Here are some facts you need. There are 168 hours in a week. If you sleep 8 hours a day, then you are awake 112 hours a week. When your teen does this, they should sleep 10 hours a night, so they are should only be awake 98 hours a week. Start with two pieces of paper and draw a big circle on each one - you are going to make two pie charts. On the first, you are going to represent your priorities - family, work or school, love, friends, and time for self. Divide your circle into 5 sections and label them, writing "priorities" on the top of the page.

Now, copy the list at the bottom of this post, transfer it to a word processing document, add other things you do each day, and take off the activities that you usually do not spend time doing. If you want the next step to be really accurate, you may need to keep track a day or two so you know exactly how much you spend on things. Now, write down how much time you spend on each activity, total it up by category and then write down the percent of time you spend on each section. Now, complete the second pie chart that reflects how you actually spend your 112 hours a week.

Do the two pie charts match? If so, then your are "balanced" and your priorities are reflected by your daily activities. More likely, your priorities do not match your activities and the difference is what causes you some frustration. If you can bring the two together, you will be happier! Have fun!

Here is a list to get you started. Please note - where things belong may be different for you and your kids. For example, I would include community service under family because I only do things that include my kids, which has always been a great excuse not to do committee work, but my kids go to a school that requires community service, so they would include it under school.

Family

• Meals (shared at the table)
• Cooking
• Cleaning the house
• Laundry
• Driving/Biking/Commuting
• Arranging activities
• Making appointments
• Shopping (Groceries, family-related)
• Walking the dog (could be exercise)
• Car-related stuff
• Supervising homework
• Finances (Paying the bills, banking, taxes)
• Recreation (Movies, skating, etc...)
• Community service
• Religious activities
• TV/movies

Work/School

• Homework
• Projects
• Professional or required reading

Love

• Dates (alone time for meals, coffee, time to talk)
• Finding a partner

Friends (which for parents probably goes in with time for self)

• Activities (Movies, games, bowling,, etc...)
• Phone
• IM
• Email

Time for Self

• Lessons and practice (music, sports, art, cooking, etc...)
• Gardening
• Reading
• Art
• Hygiene (nails, bathing, hair)
• Social time with friends
• Exercise
• Internet
• Shopping (for self)
• Massage
• Therapy (Counseling)
• Community service (volunteering at school, etc...)

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Weight-Loss Ads and Young Girls

Media literacy and deceptive advertising are hot topics lately, as is the fact that people are getting heavier and adult models are dying weighing 88 pounds. In the United States the sales of weight-loss products and dietary supplements nearly doubled between 1994 and 2002, and as I hope you know, supplements are not regulated by the FDA, and at least one company lately has had to pay millions in fines for deceptive advertising.

Within that context, a recent article in Health Education Research by Hobbs et al analyzed how 42 girls aged 9 to 17 interpreted weight-loss advertising. The results in this article suggest that:

• these girls did not notice that the ads failed to mention any health risks or dangers associated with a product;
• only 11% of the girls were aware that the people in the ads might have financial motives;
• few of the girls were aware of the message subtext;
• only 29% of the girls were able to determine who the ads were targeting; and
• only 11% of the girls noticed the use of statements about the "safety" and "all naturalness" of the products are persuasive techniques.

The good news was that 71% of the girls recognized that the use of testimonials and before/after photos were persuasive techniques and nearly half of the participants recognized the deception associated with statements about "permanent weight loss with no diet or exercise." Their findings suggest that there is a lot more parents and teachers can do to increase the media literacy of youth, particularly around weight loss.

There are no magic bullets. Weight-loss is not for sissies - it takes a lot of exercise and a reduction of calories consumed, period. We can all help girls resist the health risks associated with these potentially harmful products by increasing their media literacy as we point out these characteristics when we see the weight-loss ads on TV.

Photo credit: Travelling Matt

Labels: Body Image

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The Incredible Melting Condom

As I hope you know, HIV infection rates are growing among women as heterosexual transmission becomes more common, and there are places in the world where up to 74% of the new cases each year are in females. Biology is part of the problem. The skin lining the vaginal tract contains immune-system cells that fight infection and are the same cells that HIV infects. Social customs that allow older men to have multiple sexual partners and take younger partners are also a problem, as is the fact that most countries do pretty poor sexuality education.

This places a huge burden on women to prevent infection, especially since the best prevention, male condoms, require male cooperation. One proposed answer is vaginal microbicides that are virus-killing gels and creams that a woman can use without male permission, but they have to be inserted 1-2 hours before sex, and they "leak" out. There are at least five products in testing now.

However, in December there were several news articles about a proposed better way for women to protect themselves from HIV. One was in the Economist, that described a squishy microbicide-containing lining for the vagina from Patirck Kiser and colleagues at the University of Utah.

Talk about magic - this "molecular condom" starts off as a liquid that a woman can insert into her vagina, where her body temperature and the acidity of her vagina turn the liquid into a gel. The gel stays in her vagina until the alkalinity of semen turns the gel back into a liquid, releasing antimicrobial drugs that kill HIV. How cool would that be?

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Labels: Sexuality

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Community Service and Teens

Keeping with the themes of emotional well-being and connection, this post is about the importance of community service in the lives of teens. Mind you, I am not talking about the superficial, short term community service that "looks good" on college applications. Instead, I am talking about growing up with an inherent drive to help others and be involved in giving back to a community.

I grew up believing that families tithed 10% of their annual income to the church, which in my neighborhood was the organization that managed all of the social service needs - the homeless, the domestic violence, the single-parent households, scholarships, referral to drug and alcohol treatment, etc... Whether or not that system worked, I actually do not know, but what is interesting to me, every year at tax time, I find that I have donated about 10% of my income to schools, research, the wolf sanctuary where one of my daughters volunteers every summer, and the various charities that my family, friends, students, and colleagues support.

Volunteering and being involved in community service is a great way for teens to develop a sense of inner strength -the "self" that is not reflected by their accomplishments, failures, or family status. This inner strength is what I believe emotional well-being is all about. Teens who feel good about who the are, can form and express opinions, are loving, authentic, creative, can cope with stress, set boundaries and know where they want to go - these are the teens that are doing well emotionally.

Being involved in community service helps teens think outside their own reality. They develop values, learn about personal challenges they may never face, contribute to other people's lives, or make a difference to the world by reducing global warming, increasing recycling, or saving animals from extinction. Our world is not perfect and in every community there are ways to become involved. It is easy in organizations like the Boy and Girl Scouts that integrate community service into the mission of the group, and most counties have a volunteer center or bureau that helps connect people to organizations that need, time, money, or specific skills. Local hospitals, libraries, and schools all need volunteers.

Some how, in our busy lives, this is another area of life that we, as parents and professionals, must provide encouragement and role modeling for our teens. If we are not doing anything for anyone other than ourselves, we are teaching our children that "we" are all that matters. Finding a project that the whole family can do is a great way to role-model community service, help teens "connect" to their community, and increase family time.

Good luck and I look forward to hearing about the projects you find!

Labels: Community Service, Mental Health

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The Hidden Health Issue: Emotional Well-Being

The Lucile Packard Foundation for Children's Health has just released the results from the second annual Bay Annual Parent Poll, a telephone survey of nearly 1,800 parents from Alameda, Contra Costa, Marin, San Francisco, San Mateo, and Santa Clara counties in California.

For a second year in a row, Bay Area parents have put their children's emotional health at the top of their worry list, highlighting a health risk not usually discussed. Parents across economic, ethnic, and geographic lines said that they worried about stress, depression, weight, and the impact of family stress on their kids.

Stress and Depression
Two-thirds of the parents of teenagers said their child experiences stress from schoolwork, pressure to excel in school, divorce, and family finances. In addition, 25% of parents were concerned their child might be depressed. Comparatively, less than 10% of parents of teens were worried about their children smoking cigarettes, using alcohol, smoking marijuana, or engaging in sexual activity.

Other Results
Family Time: More than 25% of parents said they do not spend enough time together as a family.
Media: More than 45% of parents said that the media had a negative effect on their teens.

It is clear from the results of this survey that parents of older teens are more worried about their emotional health and I would guess that part of this finding reflects parents not feeling "connected" to their teens. We know that stress and depression are predictors for teens participating in many unhealthy behaviors, including drinking, smoking, and early sexual involvement.

Not only do these results call for schools and health care to regularly assess the emotional well-being of teens, it is a wake-up call for parents to "engage" with both the health care and educational systems to advocate for changes to reduce the stress our youth are feeling.

You can find additional information and more findings at http://kidsdata.org/parentpoll.

Photo credit: The Lucile Packard Foundation for Children's Health and the Survey Policy and Research Institute at San Jose State University.

Labels: Mental Health, Parenting

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Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance - United States, 2005

In the United States, 71% of all deaths among people 10 to 24 years old result from four causes - motor vehicle crashes, unintentional injuries, homicide and suicide. In 2005 the National Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS) data indicated that during the 30 days preceding the survey, many high school students engaged in behaviors that increased their likelihood of death from these four causes:

• 9.9% had driven a care or other vehicle after drinking alcohol;
• 18.5% had carried a weapon;
• 43.3% had drunk alcohol;and
• 20.2% had used marijuana.

In addition, in the 12 months preceding the survey:

• 35.9% of high school students had been in a physical fight;
• 8.4% had attempted suicide;
• 46.8% reported ever having sexual intercourse; and
• 37.2% had not used a condom at last sexual intercourse.

Among adults over 25 years old, 61% of all deaths result from cardiovascular disease and cancer, and we know that many habits that contribute to those causes of death start during adolescence. In particular, results show that in 2005 a total of 23% of high school students had smoked cigarettes during the 30 days preceding the survey and 80% had not eaten at least five servings of fruits or vegetables during the previous week, and 13% were over weight.

Every other year the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention collects YRBS data from a scientifically sound sample of all public and private schools in all 50 states and the District of Columbia. In 2005 that sample included 13,953 questionnaires from 159 schools with grades 9-12. It is clear that our youth need additional support developing habits that will help them stay healthy in adulthood.

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Labels: Sexuality

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Connection

As a new blogger, I have to admit that it has taken me a while to understand the allure of this particular form of communication. Early on I wondered why, with all the information already available to us in the form of written news, books, magazines, radio and TV, people could possibly need another form of "sharing." In addition, as a psychologist, I know that about 80% of communication is non-verbal, so I have never been a fan of electronic forms of communication.

Now, as I start to regularly wander through the blogosphere, I understand that it is not necessarily news or facts that people are looking for, but instead, a sense of "connection" to others of like mind or circumstance. In the same way that women in my childhood swapped stories and gave each other advice over daily chores in backyards, kitchens, and neighborhood parks, bloggers are creating community on the Internet.

I apologize if this is a "duh" for you, but I have been quite struck with the amount of time and energy people pour into their posts. I am also noticing that people blog on different levels - participating in personal (scrapbooking in the 21st century), parenting, professional, and community. In each of these forums, people reach out, share images and ideas, seek advice and validation, and try to integrate more humanity into our daily lives.

I do not think it is coincidental that bloggers tend to be well-educated, professional, and technological early-adopters. These are also the people who are spending more and more of their daily lives on computers, in offices, juggling the responsibilities of family and careers with self-care, and questioning their ability to "do it all" or "have it all."

I want to acknowledge the importance of "connection" for each of us - as parents, teens, professionals, neighbors, and family members. Reaching out is a wonderful and necessary thing - knowing we belong, are important to others and are contributing to a greater good are important prerequisites to life satisfaction and happiness. Acknowledging why we do things is important to understanding whether we are doing it well.

Maybe the disconnection from others that characterizes our society is starting to take its toll and blogging is a technological forum for recreating connection to family, friends, colleagues and neighbors. Connection cannot be a bad thing!

Photo credit: choconancy

Labels: Mental Health

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Medgadget 2006 Medical Weblog Awards

The polls are open until Sunday, January 14th and guess what - you can vote for Teen Health 411 as the Best New Medical Weblog (established in 2006)!

I am honored by the reader that nominated this blog for the award and want to thank Medgadget and Thinklabs Medical for hosting this contest and for my nomination.

This is the third annual Medical Weblogs Awards, which are designed to honor the best in the medical blogosphere and highlight the diverse world of medical blogs.

Here is the url for voting (in case the link above did not work): http://www.medgadget.com/archives/2007/01/2006_medical_blog_polls.html

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Coming of Age

In the United States we categorize the life cycle into three different stages – childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. The period of adolescence, ages 13–22, includes physical changes associated with puberty completing middle school, high school, and for some, college. In spite of the major undertakings during this period, and the assumption of adult responsibility associated with them, we do not systematically celebrate or ritualize the transition from childhood to adolescence.

Granted, there are privileges to look forward to – driving, money management, working, going to college (for some), and legal drinking, but there is no formal acknowledgement that things are changing in terms of relationships with family, friends, and social institutions.

In many cultures, a ceremony, ritual or celebration rings in a time when a child becomes a young adult. For boys the age is usually 12 or 13 and for girls, the Coming of Age is usually celebrated at their first menstruation, which can be as early as 9 or as late as 15. A Quinceañera is celebrated in the Mexican culture when a girl turns fifteen. It is a social introduction and dates back to the Aztec and Mayan times, somewhere around 500 B.C.

In other cultures the coming of age is usually a celebration, and may include a tattoo, a trial, the piercing of a body part, or a period of isolation. Native Americans have many variations of the coming of age ritual, depending on the tribe. For the most part, girls have their rite of passage with the first menses and boys have theirs at the age of fourteen or fifteen. Both boys and girls are separated from the tribe to spend several days alone fasting. The hunger teaches the child patience and discipline. The isolations allows the child to stay completely focused on their goal, which is to have a dream or vision. This could take anywhere from four to fourteen days.

Girls stay in a wigwam made by their mothers away from the tribe, and after their vision, return to a feast. They are welcomed back with someone saying, “You left as a girl; you return as a woman. We sorrowed when you departed, leaving behind a girl we had grown to love. We rejoice at your return, new and different. Through you, the people will live.”

Today in the United States, boys do not usually mark the transition and for girls, periods is something kept very private and rarely spoken about with others, unless the family welcomes womanhood with a special gift, meal or celebration. When marking a Coming of Age, the ritual is acknowledging the shift in the relationship between parent and child, the ties betweens friends, and the path the person will take as an adult.

For many teens, as they enter adolescence parents begin to hand over some of the responsibilities they have had for the first 12 years of a child’s life. Parents may begin to shift some of the money management decisions to the teen, some will ask teens to do more chores around the house including helping with laundry and cooking, some teens begin to make their own doctors appointments, and most become responsible for their own homework and managing their time.

Relationships with peers change, as well. Friendships may change less frequently than they did in middle school as interests become solidified and friends become important emotional supporters and social allies. Teens spend much of their free time with their friends and those friends influence many of the decisions teens make about participation in church, clubs, sports, and other social activities.

Another important part of adolescence is choosing a life path, sometimes this includes deciding to put all free time into one sport, music, dance, or other hobby, starting to prepare for college applications, doing more community service, or learning about careers that may interest them.

No matter what the focus of the teen years will be, teens begin to spend more time away from home, everything changes at home, and you can design a ritual that focuses your child on both the joy of the childhood they have experienced and the beginning of the transition into adulthood. Developing a ritual opens the conversation about how relationships and people will change in the coming years. Not everything happens at once, but there is a definite change beginning – one that teens may be insecure about and families can embrace instead of dreading!

Below are a few ideas about how to create a ritual, but be careful. These should not be a surprise unless you know your child very well. One person’s celebration could be another’s most embarrassing moment. In the best of all worlds, the young person should be involved with all the planning.

Designing your own ritual

Where. Many rituals are performed in a circle because circles represent the flow of life, the never-ending circle of growth. The circle can be made of vines, a rope, or even chairs. The circle should be large enough to include all the guests and have an opening that people enter and exit through. Once everyone enters, the opening is closed and then re-opened to leave through.

Who. I suggest you invite the immediate family and a few close friends of the person becoming a teen. Make sure everyone you invite will be supportive and open to your homegrown ritual. The immediate family should each have a role in the ritual. The roles can include the person who opens and closes the entrance to the circle, the person who stars and stops the ritual with the bell, a narrator who explains what is going on, and a leader, that asks the youth to light the candles and then invites the guests to participate, where appropriate.

What. In most ceremonies there is an altar, that you can cover with silk or cloth, and on which you can put flowers, candles, a bell, matches, a candle-snuffer, a picture of the child as a baby, or anything else that signifies the change you are celebrating. I suggest two candles, one to represent childhood and one to represent adulthood. During the ritual you can ask the child to light one candle to represent the passing of the carefree joy of childhood, and then light the second to represent the path towards adulthood and other joys still to come, or ask them to light the second candle accepting the responsibilities of adulthood.

Music is always nice – a song that the teen likes, or one representing the change everyone is facing.

Activities. There are three activities I will suggest, but anything else you think of will work, too. The first activity is the lighting of the candles mentioned above and with any narrative you choose. The second activity is a ribbon cutting. The teen and the parent, usually the mom each have an end of a 6-foot length of ribbon tied (gently) to their wrist when they enter the circle and there is a pair of scissors on the alter. During the ritual, the mother might say something to the child like “I brought you into this world and our spirits will be forever joined. However, up until this time, I have led you through life and you have listened to everything I said. If you are ready, then today our relationship changes, and I offer my guidance and ever lasting love, but know that you have started down your own path, and may not always listen. I do hope that our new relationship is one of trust, honesty and warmth. You can cut away our old relationship today, but I will always be here for you.” With that, the teen can snip the ribbon, and maybe hug the mother!

This might be a nice time for the song to be played or sang, or a prayer said, then the leader can invite everyone to come forward, take a flower from a vase and give it to the teen (who you have seated by now), and tell them what they wish for their future and adulthood. No need to suggest what to say – there will be many blessings that are spontaneous and loving! Another variation of this is to ask all guests to share something about how they have changed from when they were 13 and what they wish for the young person’s adulthood.

The ritual ends with the snuffing of the candles, the ringing of the bell, the opening of the circle, the processing of guests out, and then ends with the sharing of a cake, meal or whatever your family likes to do.

Photo Credit: dgimages

Labels: Holidays

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Teens and Work

I know this may sound a little silly coming from a woman who keeps talking about spending more unstructured time with our teens and preteens, but I think that the never ending pressure to be successful is keeping our kids from having the opportunity to work. Because it seems to be getting harder to get into top notch colleges, teens are being encouraged to do more school work and community service hours in addition to excelling in sports, music, or the arts, and more and more teens are not finding the chance to work, which concerns me. I am not talking about working more than a few hours a week because we know that teens who work more than 20 hours a week tend to be at higher risk for smoking, drinking, and dropping out of school than teens who work just a few hours a week. I am talking about encouraging teens to work a little bit for money they want for extra clothes, entertainment, or big ticket items like cars.

Granted, it is difficult to fit work into the life of a teen that may already be feeling stressed and too busy, but I think work plays an important part in teen health. Work can help teens learn to be responsible, in addition to increasing a teen's self-esteem and sense of competence. Having a job teaches teens the importance of following through, being on time, getting along with co-workers, and managing their time and money.

There are drawbacks, too. Teens tend to get minimum wage jobs in retail or food sales, which require dealing with the public and can have pretty rigorous hours. Of course, parents need to stay connected and know what our teens are being asked to do as well as help them understand their rights as employees. It is all part of learning to be an employee. Parents worried about the condition s teens work in will find the Guide for Parents (listed below under resources) very helpful.

The rules include - you have to be 14 to work in the United States (unless you work for your parents), you ned a work permit if you are under 16, and there are limits on the number of hours you can work if you are under 16, and how late you can work on school days. For example, if you are 14 or 15 you cannot cook, operate power-driven machinery unless it is office machinery, work on a ladder or scaffold, in a warehouse, or doing construction or unloading a truck. If you are under 18 you cannot drive as part of the job, operate power equipment, work in mining, wrecking, demolition, meat-packing, or where there are explosives or any exposure to radiation. If you want to know the laws in your state, the link to Teens & Work below includes a link to the labor departments in different states.

Maybe the key is summer work, which would not interfere with family time or school, but would provide teens the opportunity to explore fields they might be interested in, develop a work ethic, and even start to build a resume. I brought the possibility up with my nearly 15-year old a few weeks ago when we were talking about summer - and she was saying she did not want to do the same camp she has always done, or music lessons, or pretty much any structured activity I could come up with. So, I suggested she consider a summer job, and she looked mortified! Her reaction surprised me so much I asked her when she thought her parents had started working and I realized she did not know that we had both worked through our teen years - I suppose it is the difference between our working class upbringing and the middle class experience we have provided for our children.

Finally, after talking on and off for a few days, she identified her feelings - saying she was very sad - she realized her childhood was drawing to a close and soon new responsibilities would claim her free time. We do not have a plan for the summer, but I expect it will be a combination of unstructured "celebration" of her childhood and some form of work or volunteer experience.

I look forward to some comments from parents who have already experienced this transition!

Resources
Teens & Work
Working Teens Pamphlet from the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health (NIOSH)
Working Teen Guide for Parents

Photo credit: McBeth

Labels: Employment

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