Teens and Stress
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Nancy L. Brown, PhD
Like adults, teens can become stressed out without knowing it is happening. One minute all is well, but then he or she gets behind in homework or starts one too many after school activity, or projects are due all at once, or a team goes to nationals, or a family faces a crisis that distracts the teen, or an important person in their life experiences a crisis, a friend or romantic partner dumps them … there is no end to what can go wrong.
Teens though, unlike adults, may not have ever experienced the new level of stress and may not be aware of how much it is affecting their behavior. Parents can help identify the signs of the stress and help teens find ways to remove some of the stress or at least cope with it.
Tips for preventing stress in teens
• Be a role model. Try to remain calm when dealing with stressful situations. When stressed, demonstrate coping strategies – get enough rest, eat well, and seek support. If you know a particularly stressful event is coming, talk with your teen about how to prepare and avoid getting “stressed out.”
• Focus on the process instead of the outcome. How hard a child tries is more important than the grade they receive.
• Help teens monitor activities and “over scheduling.” Talk with your teen about their motivations, balancing extracurricular activities, sports, and schoolwork with time for friends, family, and relaxation.
Tips for addressing stress in teens
• Help teens identify “stress.” Recognize heart beating fast, butterflies, tightness in chest, obsessive thoughts about being ready for things, inability to enjoy restful activities, etc…
• Teach teens ways to relax and cope with stress – taking a bath, exercising, yoga or deep breathing and meditation, listening to or making music, etc…
• Remind teens that they are control of some things in their lives, encourage them to make decisions and prioritize activities they can.
• Encourage teens to talk about what is causing the stress and identify healthy ways of dealing with it.
• Identify perceived “unhealthy” ways of coping with stress including using alcohol or drugs, ignoring a problem, watching too much TV or playing too many video games, or getting irritable and cranky.
Tags:
Photo credit: vidrio
Labels: Mental Health
5 Comments:
At Wed Sep 26, 08:57:00 AM 2007,
Anonymous said…
my stress is so overwelming it istakeing over my life
At Wed Sep 26, 10:27:00 AM 2007,
Nancy L. Brown, PhD said…
Felling so stressed is not good! Some things that work to relieve stress for everyone are exercising, deep breathing (in and out), yoga, and meditation - please try one!
If you are a student, talk to a parent, teacher, counselor, or peer counselor that you trust, and ask for tips on managing schoolwork or personal situations that are contributing to the stress.
If you are an adult, please find a counselor that you can talk with soon. Good luck!
At Wed May 28, 06:44:00 AM 2008,
harshada said…
according to me if you are stressed then take a break from your daily routine and go for a picnic with your friends to a place which is full of natural beauty.
At Tue Aug 26, 12:25:00 PM 2008,
Mrs. Potato Head said…
Our child is 13. She is our only child. She is quite an accomplished A student and a young musician of 4 instruments (violin, cello, piano and flute)all based on her own free will to learn. She is never pushed to practise for any set amount of minutes per day. But she has won many competitions before and is considered as very talented by all.
Since she was 12, she began to talk back, pose an attitude on her face and even tell us (parents) that she didn't like to be "watched over her shoulders". The fact is that we are not what she claimed we were. We encourage her to reach her goals, try her best and always, always give her the space to work, play, mingle with friends and relax.
Her most noticeable change is her choice of friends. She used to take my (mom's) advice. Now, she is obviously becoming a name brand person. Her mom (I) is very down to earth, pleasant, clean and tidy. That is what we teach her all these years and now she seems to like to mingle with girls who spend way too much time on their external appearances. That really kills me.
We are a family of catholics. She basically follows our directions (99% of the time) but when she chooses not to, she can be such a "devil" to deal with.
She is always very conscientious about her school work and so we just leave her alone.
But, recently, she suddenly changed again. She is now back to her "old" self who wants hugs and kisses, reassurance of "I love YOU" and mommy's ways.
Is this change from good to bad, bad to good, common for people her age? or should I be cautious that this will change again soon?
Thanks!
At Thu Aug 28, 11:41:00 AM 2008,
Nancy L. Brown, PhD said…
Your daughter sounds wonderful, and yes, please do expect that she will change again, and likely swing back and forth, for up to four more years - while she moves through puberty and finds "her voice."
She is perfectly normal, and many parents would consider you quite lucky if 99% of the time she follows your rules and ideas.
One thing I would like to point out, is that you said "The fact is that we are not what she claimed we were," which cannot be true. If she feels this way, then she believes it - and that is what she is reacting to - whether you believe it is true, or not.
I encourage you to ask her to tell you what you do that makes her feel this way - and then decide if you can change a few behaviors to "keep the peace." Good luck!
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